The Offensive Reality

{March 31, 2010}   Geeky Men

Okay people, here it is plain and simple. I want to know where all these fucking sexy GEEK men are? I know they are out there. I mean glory be to twitter for putting them right there in my face, and sending my sexual frustration into maximum overdrive. Every fucking day. But guess what? They aren’t HERE. As in, in my little ass Eastern county, little shit town. As in they aren’t here, sitting in my living room, in their boxer briefs, playing video games and watching Star Wars with me. For some reason, they all seem to be on the West Coast. Tormenting me in every way possible. TV is horrible for putting these thoughts in our heads as well. I mean come on! Logan from Dark Angel. Xander from Buffy. And that sexy dude in Live Free or Die Hard?!

Rob Sheridan

What makes these men fit this bill? Well, try and keep up.

Clothing is optional. Sure, I prefer your jeans and tee-shirts. Specifically if they have geeky logos, Mario, Toad or any of the likes on them. But, lets be honest, if we are sitting here battling it out in Star Wars Legos, the less the better for those breaks in between each Episode we conquer. As much as I like swinging a lightsaber at all the oncoming Stormtroopers, it probably isn’t the top most thought in my head.

And the video games? I don’t want some fucking douche who’s idea of wielding a controller is popping in Cabella’s Big Game Hunt. I live in a redneck area, and I damn well don’t care to see your 8-point rack on the wall, while watching you blast through all your illegal does on my big tv. Instead, I want the man who is going to be able to lead me through the land of Hyrule and know exactly which of Link’s melodies need to be played on his flute. You dude, might be lucky if you keep your shorts on until we reach the Ocorina.

After we’ve burnt out the buttons on the controller, there is nothing sexier than a man who’d rather put in Science Fiction, or any B-rated horror movie. Fuck those stupid sporting shows and movies. I want to see galaxies far, far away, Middle Earth, Narnia and Fantasia. I want to see him get excited over lightsaber battles, kidnapping Santa Claus, ROUSes and Giant ass Hobbit eatting Spiders.

Now before you go jumping the gun, getting all excited because you think you see yourself here, there is one last item on this list of criteria.

Brains. Yeah, you better have some fucking wit and sense buried in there somewhere. Now, I’m not a rocket scientist, as they say. But I’m not some dumbass redneck bimbo either. I like when you talk about your computer, your iPhone, your fancy cameras, and that wonderful gadgetry. I like your vocabulary that ranges above a high school freshman’s. Personally, if I don’t have half a clue as to what you are talking about, I’m turned on in so many ways that you’d probably blush. I love the thought that I can learn from you. I love the thought that you are smart. And I love the thought that being intellegent, your mind is probably open to a life of possibilities and options. And that mind is probably the sexiest fucking thing you can bring to the table. Or bed.

All you movie star loving women out there can keep your Brad Pitt, Gerald Butler, and Johnny Depp. (Well, okay, I’ll keep Johnny Depp. Pirates are just as sexy.) I’ll stick to perusing the world of the internet for the real men.


Okay Chrissa touched on the TV series hotties and I am going to take you on a trip down the WEB SERIES lane of super hotties that just make me go YUMMY!

Most of you are going to freak out saying “OMG, I can’t believe this girl likes Lonelygirl15” but come on… what red blooded female wouldn’t want to jump on the LG15 (KateModern) bandwagon just to get a taste of this? So, instead of words, I give you photographic evidence of some of the yummiest pieces of geek out there! (in my opinion of course… but then again Rob is one super fine hot geek too)

In order of appearance: Jackson Davis (Jonas), Andrew Strouthos (Xavier), James Olds (Bray), Craig Coyne (Carl), Maxwell Glick (Spencer), Giles Alderson (Steve), Yousef Abu-Taleb (Daniel), Brett Ryback (Reed), Austin McConnell (Mason), Ralf Little (Gavin), Jai Rajani (Tariq)

Okay, I’ve probably overloaded your brains with all these man (and there are many more)… and if you are as sexually frustrated as Chrissa over there then you are doomed!  Yes the Lonelygirl15 universe has pretty much every kind of geek sexiness you can imagine!  So diss it all you want, but I’ve talked to some of these characters “in-game” and “out-of-game” and they are just as yummy out of character as they are in!

You know what? Screw the sexually frustrated.. I want to share more eye candy! So here you go! (a little bit of something for EVERYONE…)

Photo of ~Mitch~File:DrHartChar-Square.jpgFile:VirgilChar-Square.jpgFile:Beaumont.jpgFile:S2 Icon - Lee.jpgFile:TerrenceChar-Square.jpgFile:KM230-Rupert-cropped-recolored.jpgFile:S2 Toe char.jpg File:Bartek-tempav2.jpgFile:Ursyn-rough.jpgFile:Daniel-av.jpgFile:Natan-av.jpgFile:Rafal-av.jpg

just too many names to list right now… DM me if you want to know more about them!


@LStacey says:

One hot geek, checking in! 😉

[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Chrisinda Lukens and Chrisinda Lukens, Chrisinda Lukens. Chrisinda Lukens said: Where the hell are all the Sexy Geeky Men?!!!! New Blog: […]

I’ll take one sexy geek over ten Hollywood stars any day of the week. Twice on Friday.

I love this post.

Cheers to Hot, Sexy Geeks everywhere! 🙂

Mitch says:

LMAO I’m on there! too funny:P

[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Someone and Someone, Chrisinda Lukens. Chrisinda Lukens said: Geeky Men are the sexiest! (trying it again, because all the links before quit working.) […]

Who knew there were so many people into geeky men?! LOL

I am SOOOOOOOOOOOO forwarding this to Andrew and James. :p Totally made my day XD

as you see Andrew and James were both at the front of the list of hotties from the first group… LOL

Social comments and analytics for this post…

This post was mentioned on Twitter by femaleprodigy: @Chrissarella

[…] } Yesterday, on another blog I share with my friend Chrissa, we posted about Geeky Men in which I posted pretty much every male to grace us with his presence on the web series […]

Game says:

Some cool peeps there.

I don’t think I have seen this depicted that way before. You actually have cleared this up for me. Thanks!

Paige says:

Best Buy commercials are always my favorite. Geek Squad is too sexy 😉

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